Dear Sick: One could look at these uncalled-for remarks as klutzy compliments. After all, the exes offering their unsolicited opinions seem to feel you'd be better off with them. I think a good all-purpose remark might be, "You know, you can't tell a book by its cover, and his book is better than your cover." Tune out the noise, babe, and chalk the remarks up to sour grapes — and bad manners. — Margo, airily

Pushy Anti-Teetotalers

Dear Margo: I recently made the decision to stop drinking. I realized there had been a dramatic increase in the quantity and frequency of my drinking. I was hungover at least once a week. There were times I didn't remember what I'd done the night before. There's a history of alcoholism in my family, and I don't want to go down that road. I also have a daughter who is not quite a year old, and it hit me that during those periods I don't remember, I could accidentally do something to hurt her.

I am handling the abstinence well, working out and spending more time with my daughter. The problem is that many friends don't understand my decision. Some think I'm being ridiculous and going too far by giving up drinking completely. Some even suggested I should drink because I am more "outgoing and fun" after I've had a few. Several of these people frequently offer me drinks. I know they don't mean any harm, but it's making me nuts. Any witty responses to the comments? — Off the Sauce

Dear Off: Your situation is more common than you might imagine. I don't know what the dynamic is, but drinkers always want other people to imbibe, as well. (I salute your decision, by the way. It sounds constructive and thoughtful, given the situation you outline.) As for friends saying you are more "outgoing and fun" when you're a little lit, I know more than one alcoholic who believes this friendly "evaluation." I hope you will not let this argument alter your decision. Blackouts are a serious sign of alcoholism, and family history does figure in, so tune out the booze promoters. A good response might be, "I feel too good on the wagon to want to fall off." Anyone who takes it further is dim and has a problem. — Margo, soberly

Dear Margo is written by Margo Howard, Ann Landers' daughter. All letters must be sent via e-mail to dearmargo@creators.com. Due to a high volume of e-mail, not all letters will be answered.